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suspnd:

suspnd:

suspnd:

my best friend just realized 30 minutes before her curfew that she’s an hour away from home in the most dangerous part of the city alone with the buses no longer running so she calls the police to take her home i cant stop laughing

update the cop that came to pick her up is a hot 20 year old guy thats flirting with her and now im not laughing anymore

SHE FUCKING HOOKED UP WITH THE COP

elubviq:

expert-jumper:

unscinfinity:

expert-jumper:

It is the year 2046. The time has come for the annual Blog Inspection. Armed android wardens begin to arrive at the homes of the country’s prisoners who were once called citizens. A warden knocks on a ramshackle door. It is answered by an old man, bedraggled, starving, weary. The robotic guard’s abdominal display screen flickers to life with the image of a popular post on tumblr. “This has to be on everyone’s blog at least once,” intones the android. Fear enters the man’s eyes. He has not reblogged this post. He shrieks and, with one fell motion, blasts a hole into the android’s head with his laser magnum. Everyone in the neighborhood watches on in horror as the man, calling for liberation, is tackled by dozens of androids. His screams die with the buzz of plasma spears. There is no freedom. This has to be on everyone’s blog at least once. Everyone’s.

are you okay there

E V E R Y O N E

NO CHANCES TAKEN

To Tumblr, Love Pixel Union